February 19, 2019 -
“I figure if I’m gonna be a mess, I might was be a HOT mess” - Mindy Kaling
I was amazed. The party started at around 7 pm last night and went non stop until dawn.
There was a wedding here last night. A big one. How to describe it?
It was loud. Very loud. We are talking a Bon Jovi concert. Not the later crap stuff. No, we are talking about when they were early, raw, and played at an ear bleeding level. The music is a mix of K Pop bands and disco with a very heavy base line. Oh and there were search lights piercing the sky. And you could hear cheers from the crowd as they performed a Bollywood cover of ‘We Will Rock You’.
Then, on the rare band breaks someone would come to the microphone and deliver amusing anecdotes, at least I think they were amusing - they were in Hindi, and then spontaneously sing a cappella that sort of sounded like John Denver with a Hindi accent.
It was so loud. And it was over a mile away!
Indian weddings are a big business here. We pass venues every where. And you need a large venue because they are such large affairs. This is the wedding season in India. The weather is mild and the monsoons don’t start for another 3 months.
Although the bride is the star of these events, the culture is still very rough for women here. There are many examples of progressive accomplished women in India who chart their own paths, but, for most women here, that is not the case. The majority of weddings are arranged affairs. Education for girls is mostly to make them more attractive for potential suitors , not to better their own lives. There are ads in the paper highlighting a girls attributes for marriage suitors. “She is a good worker, submissive, etc”
Once married, opportunities are few. The bride will usually go to live with the husband’s family to work domestically and rear children. Divorce is rare. It was Colleen who noticed that there were very few women working in the shops we passed. Almost all the employees are male.
And sadly, women here are still very vulnerable to violence. “Kitchen Accidents” are not uncommon where the husband or a disgruntled family member will put kerosene on the wife and set her on fire. We visited the cafe earlier in the trip where victims of acid attacks work.
There is hope. As India enters the world stage as a economic power the government is working to change this environment and make more opportunities for girls. It is improving but change is slow, especially for a culture this ancient.
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