“To get back up to the shining world from there
My guide and I went into that hidden tunnel,
And Following its path, we took no care
To rest, but climbed: he first, then I-so far,
through a round aperture I saw appear
Some of the beautiful things that Heaven bears,
Where we came forth, and once more saw the stars.”
- Dante Alighieri
“From here on out, there's just reality. I think that's what maturity is: a stoic response to endless reality. But then, what do I know?”
- Carrie Fisher, Postcards from the Edge
Chadwick Boseman died the other day. He was the actor that portrayed ‘The Black Panther’, a Marvel fictional superhero whose film made over a billion dollars and was nominated for multiple Academy Awards. T’Challa, his character’s name, was a King who ruled an African utopian empire and used his great power to help others.
In his portrayal, you were drawn to the king not because of his power alone, but due to his regal nature; his confidence. He had a stillness within him that made others want to listen to him. It also made you want to follow him.
It appears the actor also shared these qualities in real life. He was diagnosed the late stage colon cancer four years ago and despite the ravages of the disease he continued to work making multiple memorable films and seemed destined for a bright career. He kept his diagnosis a secret so that you would admire his work and not pity him in his savage struggle to stay alive. He wanted you to remember his work. He embraced stoicism as a form of majesty and died a king.
He was only 43 years old.
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The summer of 2020 has sucked.
As I have written before, I started this blog not only to share travel adventures, but to write about life in early retirement. As difficult as these days of summer have been I want to remember these times and see where we are going. When we started traveling, the journeys became more than a checklist of sites to see. We were changed by the experience as we saw the world and our own country in a new light. In this time of quarantines and poisoned political discourse, is is room for growth?
So I wanted to borrow the title from Carrie Fisher’s best selling book “Postcards from the Edge” and share some snapshots from this challenging summer.
I am standing in front of the classroom with my story in hand reading to the class, “What I did this summer”.
My hands shake a little as I begin to read..
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First, a primal scream….
There are a little over 60 days until the next general election. You can’t get away from it. It’s all over the news.
As of today 187,736 people have died. If you lined up all the coffins it would stretch over 284 miles.
Let that sink in a moment.
Yet the President pretends we do not have a problem and ignores the fact that we lead the world in cases of the infection. Unemployment is at its greatest level since the Great Depression. He has added trillions of dollars to the national debt. And our country is crying out for justice with racial strife. This is Trump’s America. Chaos reigns.
And he wants more time in office!
He spends his days trying to convince people that those who oppose him are wanting to turn the United States into the failed state of Venezuela. “Your cities will burn!” he cries.
As absurd as this proposition is, some people believe him. Despite his long record of lying and deception, they accept his proclamations as gospel truth. They live in fear of their neighbors and fellow Americans. Trump feeds on this fear like a ravenous predator.
What can I say about Trump that I have not already written and you have heard many times before? I have friends and family who defend him and have called me a “sheep” for believing otherwise. People are entrenched because they have tied their individual self worth to this man.
I can only say this to those who may support this tin pot dictator with delusions of godhood; here are 10 well documented reasons NOT to vote for him -
(1) He is vulgar.
(2) He is unlettered.
(3) He is prone to nepotism with disastrous results.
(4) He is unusually susceptible to venality.
(5) He is the most racist Chief Executive since Woodrow Wilson.
(6) He has led the way to our loss of global leadership.
(8) He has been impeached by the House of Representatives for crimes violating his oath of office - (he freely admits he did these things).
(9) His gross incompetence has led to the deaths of thousands.
(10) And through all the chaos he is guilty of serial mendacity.
How hard is this to understand?
I don’t have the answers to all the problems we are facing, but I do know the first step toward solving them - VOTE.
“That’s all I have to say about that…”
-Forest Gump
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“In sickness and in health….”
One of the many reasons I retired early from a full time medical practice is Colleen and I wanted to accomplish some things while we were healthy. Both of us are now fast approaching sixty and there are still places to go, things to see, and life to be lived.
We have yet to face any serious health issues that would jeopardize this ambitions.
Until this summer.
Colleen has long suffered from Meniere’s Syndrome and vestibular dysfunction. It has taken most of her hearing and given her chronic headaches and vertigo. For the most part she has managed all these years with strength and quiet resolve. She would occasionally have episodes of severe vertigo with associated nausea and vomiting that we managed episodically.
It is a frustrating and at times crippling disorder of unknown cause and few treatments. Since she was having episodes only occasionally, we carried on with life and simply waited for the next episode. Sometimes weeks or months would go before another ‘attack’. There was no pattern, but we managed.
About two months ago the episodes increased in frequency and severity. For days on end she would be unable to leave the house and I was fearful of leaving her alone. The vertigo was so severe that she would fall and could easily hurt herself. She could no longer drive. Our world changed dramatically.
It became clear we needed to increase medical intervention. There are only three specialists in Indiana who deal with this confusing and obscure condition. It took weeks to get an appointment. In the interval, I would pour into my textbooks trying to learn as much as I can about treatments. This is not my area of specialty so my ability to provide learned advice was limited. What I did read pointed towards the next steps as serious surgical intervention with the good chance of permanent hearing loss as a consequence.
I was in despair. I didn’t know what to do. So I stayed by her side and tried to nurse her along. What was our future going to look like now?
I want to be clear that both of us know there are people in the world who suffer from so much more. The Boseman family is just one example. We are grateful for all that we have had and for what is still to come.
Still, it is our grief. We cannot diminish our suffering because someone may have more. It is our burden to find a way to give it meaning.
After the first month she began to improve. The episodes became less severe but were still too frequent. We finally saw the specialist who helped us to understand the diagnosis and give us a plan. No surgical intervention for now. New medications and a diet to eliminate food triggers are the new treatments. It is a chronic condition and cannot be cured. But it can be managed.
As of today, she is improved. We may never be out of the woods, but we are beginning to see a more hopeful path out of the summer of 2020.
“To be grateful for the good things that happen in our lives is easy, but to be grateful for all of our lives the good as well as the bad, the moments of joy as well as the moments of sorrow, the successes as well as the failures, the rewards as well as the rejections that requires hard spiritual work. Still, we are only grateful people when we can say thank you to all that has brought us to the present moment. As long as we keep dividing our lives between events and people we would like to remember and those we would rather forget, we cannot claim the fullness of our beings as a gift of God to be grateful for. Let's not be afraid to look at everything that has brought us to where we are now and trust that we will soon see in it the guiding hand of a loving God.”
― Henri Nouwen
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The pandemic has touched everything in life these days. It is hard to remember what it is like to go to the mall, see a movie, travel, or just see friends.
It has kicked live theatre in the balls.
I have been running a Shakespeare Festival (Bard Fest) here in the city for many years. 2020 was poised to be our biggest year. We had new grant money, sponsors, local recognition, and were poised to expand with new products and venues.
Then, the world caught on fire and everyone ran for cover. The arts were devastated. I searched for a way to continue my company and still be safe.
My team and I hit on an idea. What if we took theatre on the road to outdoor venues where performances could be done in relative safety. We would enforce social distancing and mask wearing and still have a good time.
I found a piece from The Reduced Shakespeare Company we could perform. It was a fast paced comic farce that I had done before. It required little set up and was easily transportable.
“Bard Fest on Tour” was born.
We are half way through the tour today. The show has been a hit and we have only been rained out once. We have traveled all over the city and have dates booked in other towns as well.
During these troubled times, it is a distinct pleasure to bring laughs on lovely summer evenings with the show. The poetry is immortal and to see people relax and let it wash over them felt like a ministry. The arts are what makes us human.
“If we shadows have offended,
Think but this, and all is mended, That you have but slumber'd here While these visions did appear. And this weak and idle theme,
No more yielding but a dream, Gentles, do not reprehend:
if you pardon, we will mend: And, as I am an honest Puck, If we have unearned luck
Now to 'scape the serpent's tongue, We will make amends ere long; Else the Puck a liar call;
So, good night unto you all.
Give me your hands, if we be friends, And Robin shall restore amends.”
-A Midsummers Night Dream
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I finished reading my paper before the class, handed it to the teacher and take my seat.
These are just some postcards from this extraordinary summer. I don’t know what is ahead, no one does. Can it get much worse?
It feels like a giant water slide we are hurtling down. We twist and turn in the tunnel fearfully waiting to be shot out into the dazzling sky at the end.
I am hanging on for now and hoping we all will walk out one day and once more see the stars.
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