“You’re wrong Jenny….I know what love is….”
- Forest Gump
Yes I know Thanksgiving has long since past. However, the holiday was unique for Colleen and i and I wanted to share what happened. We had to wait to tell the story until now.
November 25, 2021
It wasn’t just brisk this morning, it was cold. Stephen and his girlfriend Alex had taken the red eye from San Francisco and their plane landed shortly before 6am. Colleen and I were excited to see him. He hasn’t been home in 7 months and the pandemic has made traveling difficult.
The muddled climate of Indiana was kind that morning. Although it was chilly, there was no wind and the moon was bright and clear. I pulled into the busy arrival lane at the airport and after a few minutes, there he was walking out. Tall, thin, with long hair now and the quick smile than always made me so happy to see him.
I was introduced to Alex, who agreed to bundle up with him and fly to the midwest just to spend a few days at Thanksgiving with us. It was easy to see why Stephen was smitten with her. She has a lovely bright smile, a quick engaging wit, and laughed easily. She was charming and I am looking forward to getting to know her this busy holiday.
We climbed into the heated car and headed off into the darkness of Mooresville. As we arrived home, the sun was just coming up. The orange tendrils of the dawn were working through the leafless branches. I smiled. Indiana was showing off this morning. The home looked inviting pulling into the driveway with the lights still on against the pink sky.
Colleen and I worried a bit about this arrival. We have 3 dogs now. Visions of the hounds from the “Christmas Story” movie were ever present in our thoughts. Yesterday I spent all morning bathing them. There coats are fresh, soft, and each of them had a checkered kerchief around their necks. Despite this effort to make them look good, it will in no way stop them from being idiots. Later today Rusty and Curtis will arrive with their Boston bulldog “Moe”. “Moe” actively tried to kill Flash when he was alive. It is not that Flash didn’t deserve it, bit still….
There may be blood.
It didn’t take long. We were visiting with Stephen and Alex when we heard loud barking. “it sounds like Charlie has treed a raccoon”, Colleen said. It wasn’t a raccoon. It was Curtis and Rusty trapped in their small Kia by three barking dogs. After they were rescued our gathering grew.
Curtis and Rusty have filled a void in our lives. They have become the extended family for which we all long to be around the most. They are the favorite Uncles, Aunts, and cousins everyone wants to see. We do not get to see them often enough and to have them join us this holiday with the boys is a rare treat.
And knowing what is to come made it all the sweeter.
Our house is of reasonable size but quickly became crowded. And everyone wasn’t here yet! With 6 adults and 4 dogs it became crowded in the kitchen as we squeezed past each other and told stories of what’s happening in our lives. Colleen is a sublime hostess. She thinks of so many small details to make your stay more pleasant that it feels like you are visiting an upscale Air BnB. She makes all of it look effortless (It isn’t).
But here is the thing. She isn’t showing off. She is crazy talented but she doesn’t draw attention to herself doing it. It is how she shows love for you. You enter a beautiful world and feel warm and full of amazing food. Wave after wave of it. It is a thing of beauty to watch and to feel her show her affection for you even after 40 years is still a privilege.
Thanksgiving indeed.
We split Thanksgiving with the other Dobbs’ household. Emily and Chris spend Thursday at her parents home with their large extended family. They have a horse farm in Aurora, Indiana. I remember as a child long trips to Abilene Texas where both my Grandmothers lived. We would have both dinners on the same day. It was a gastrointestinal ordeal because inevitably we could never eat as much with the second meal. So we usually have our dinner on Friday.
This was fine. That just means we extended eating longer throughout the holiday moving from one appetizer and treat to the next before the big meal. Both of our boys love to cook and have become quite good at it.
Stephen had first crack at the kitchen and with Alex’s help began to bake. This was no amateur effort. Stephen over the last few years has become an accomplished cook. The only thing that slowed him down was not knowing where Colleen kept everything. He baked a superb apple pie that would win any county fair and amazing cookies with salted chocolate. I spent the holiday moving from treat to treat like some overweight Labrador retriever. It was heaven.
Thursday evening Chris and Emily arrived. They drove up to the house in a post Turkey haze. Now our home was completely full. For the first time in our memory every guest space we had available was filled. When Phillis, Colleen’s mother, joined us, the house became crowded.
I know many people take for granted having a large family gathering for the holidays. For Colleen and I it is a rare event.. Due to the flows and eddies of life our extended families spread to the ends of the earth.
It has been since I was a child, when our family used to make the pilgrimage to Abilene Texas to see my Mother’s numerous relatives, that I have been in such a gathering. I never enjoyed the trips. There were people I did not know who had shared experiences I never had, all trapped in a small old home built in the 1940’s. I found it difficult to make meaningful connections so as soon as I was old enough to make my own decisions I never went back. That was probably one of my many mistakes in life, but that was the reality I knew. I had always hoped my boys would enjoy coming home and look forward to the visits despite being such a poor role model.
And here they are! Nine people, four dogs, and almost a dozen chickens all in the same space. It was noisy, crowded, with people huddled in every corner telling the stories of their lives. The house was brimming with life.
I do not think my boys will ever appreciate the feelings Colleen and I were having in this moment. They need to grow older. Kids will smirk when they see older people act so sentimental about such things. It’s ok. One day they will know.
On Friday we at last gathered around the table for the meal. We stood and held hands and said a brief grace. Then, one by one, we went around the room expressing what we were thankful for this year.
Christopher spoke last, “I am grateful to be a part of such a big family and to be able to share with you that we will soon be adding another member. Emily is pregnant. We are expecting the baby in April”.
Colleen and I are going to be Grandparents!
Happy Thanksgiving!
Postscript:
January 6, 2022. In 4 days we were supposed to leave for the next episode of The Road to Bali. After 2 years and being fully vaccinated we felt it would be a good time to dip our toes back into the traveling waters. We had planned a wonderful trip.
Then Omicron hit and the world once again was on fire.
So we waited and, like everyone else , are wondering when we will stop learning new letters of the Greek alphabet.
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